Friday, April 7, 2017

10 Suggestions To Optimize Your Day

10 Suggestions To Optimize Your Day  

Life isn’t easy, but getting the most out of it solely depends on us.
 
Sometimes it seems like when one difficult concern is behind us, there’s another right around the corner; so we are faced with another struggle unexpected.
Mistakes happen. Ups and downs will  be a part of our journey.
 
It’s better to accept the situations, 
rather than fight them.
 
Nevertheless, how can we live better today than yesterday?
 
The following ten suggestions helped me become more effective and live life more peacefully and rewarding. Perhaps they will help you, too.
 
1 - Responsibility. We can only be responsible for our actions. We must adapt to the circumstances in life, and not vice versa.
 
2 - Challenges. We will always have challenges. The question is how to deal with them effectively with as little damage to ourselves and our environment.
 
3 - Forgiveness. We shouldn’t be too harsh on ourselves (or others) – forgiveness begins at home. A mistake remains a mistake if we do nothing to correct it.
 
4- Liberation. It is important to release and let go of mistakes - to express regret, ask for forgiveness and show willingness to correct ourselves the next time.
 
5 – Rumination. The constant obsession with the past causes us harm, so continue building a bright future by looking ahead.
 
6 - Humanity. We're all humans. It is important to be in control, speak up when necessary, remain silent in the appropriate times and move forward.
 
7 - Proportion. Nothing is the "end of the world" - unless we decide it to be.
 
8 – The Future. There’s always tomorrow. There is always another chance to correct a miscommunication or error. We need to allow it to happen.
 
9 - Respect. Don’t underestimate the feelings of someone who's been hurt. Express remorse, walk in their shoes and feel what they feel. Every human being deserves basic respect.
 
10 - And finally - Ambition. Accept the fact that part of our work in life is to never stop aspiring to be the absolute best we can be.

Much love 
Estee 💟

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

The Secret To A Successful Relationship - Part 2

Transforming Relationships From A Crisis Situation, Into A Loving and Long Lasting Success. 

Part 2 

Continuing; 7 Winning Tips to improve your relationship

Tip # 1;
A) initiate a conversation with your husband so that you can express your feelings and what ails you. Not to complain; "You don't  ... you're not..  but rather begin every sentence with; "I feel ....

B) Don't suppress emotions. If you do not talk about your feelings, in the end, you'll explode and say or do things you may regret. Anger does not diminish the measure of love, it's ok to be angry with those you love. In fact, we get hurt the most from those we love, because we care for them the most. 

Tip # 2;
Create a process to solve problems without being angry. Each partner takes five minutes to express their feelings. Take a break of 15-20 minutes to contemplate the others position and how each can best deal with the problem. Then come back to the table for another ten minutes to discuss things, knowing that it is alright if the problem isn't resolved immediately.

Tip # 3;
Do not hoard anger. When your partner comes to talk to you about something that's bothering him, do not use this time as an opportunity to raise issues from the past and use them against his claim. Instead, deal with the issues he raises, and if you have unresolved feelings from problems in the past, talk about them another time.

Tip # 4;
Do not allow yourself to be dragged into arguments. Remember, negative attention is still attention. If your spouse is trying to drag you into an argument, choose consciously not to go there. People like to argue because it gives them a temporary feeling of strength and satisfaction. Avoid being sucked into their need for attention.

Tip # 5;
Make your spouse a king. Give up the need to control. Give him respect and show him that his opinion is important. Be sensitive to your partner's desires.
Always check with him; Is it okay if we go to David and Michelle tonight? What do you think about ...?

Tip # 6: Even when he makes a mistake, behaves disrespectfully or is insensitive, do not be tempted to react on impulse. Nothing good can come out of that.

A peaceful household is the bearer for abundance and blessing. Let this be your motto.

Tip # 7;
If you are not satisfied with the existing reality, decide to do things differently. You can always change your strategy.


Albert Einstein said, "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different result." 
Understand that change must come from you.

Much love 
Estee 💟

Monday, February 27, 2017

The Secret To A Successful Relationship - Part 1

Transforming Relationships From A Crisis Situation, Into A Loving and Long Lasting Success. 

Part 1

Do you find that your relationship status is not particularly bright? Do you feel that you have reached a dead end in marriage because the partnership has ceased? Do you feel lonely and unhappy... Do these feelings sound familiar?

Do you find yourself blaming your partner for what is happening in your relationship?

As long as you remain in the blame/complain mode, you'll stay stuck in place, as you continue to waste precious energy unproductively. If you want to move forward and achieve a better quality of life, you must look at things from a different angle; from an unfamiliar point of view. It may not be easy, but there is no other choice. It is the only way to gain clarity of mind so you can reconsider and act appropriately.

"When we can not change the situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."
Victor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning.

Truth: It is rare to find a pair that does not run into some bumps along the road during the marriage, we all have ups and downs. This is normal.

Truth: As long as you want (everything starts with a desire) to improve the situation before it is too late, there is still hope! Think about what you could gain along the way ...

"Change your perspective and transcend beyond life's imperfections."

Acknowledge your situation, understand the limitations, do what's in your power to make improvements and proceed forward.

Once you recognize and understand the source of the problems in the relationship, you'll be able to handle them more effectively, ultimately decreasing their frequency. 

When we enter a relationship we do not always have enough understanding of what to do together and how to behave towards each other, in order to build a loving, supportive relationship. 

We tend to "operate automatically", according to what we have absorbed from the environment and based on what we've learned from our parents. The problem is that what we've learned from our parents and grandparents, is not necessarily a winning recipe for creating the successful relationship we have always dreamed of. 

Each one of us enters the relationship dynamic with his/her emotional freight, expectations, values ​​and belief system which are often unmatched to that of our significant other. It is no surprise that when the honeymoon phase comes to an end, problems begin to emerge.

However, when a couple has a basic understanding of the personality structure of one another, as well as what they want to achieve together as a couple, there is no power on earth that can separate them.

The most well known couple dated back in history is Adam and Eve.
We can learn a lot from this biblical story; Adam complained to the Creator, having experienced Eve's seducing and urging to eat from the fruits of the tree of knowledge; "The woman you put here with me--she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it."

What we learn from this, is that we tend to blame one another for what's broken in the relationship, rather than examining what our responsibility is, in addition to how we improve the situation.

First, you must identify what your true desire is. If you want to improve the situation and build a relationship where you can grow together, love, and support each other, that in itself is a wonderful start.

Secondly, make a list of what you want to receive and what you're willing to give to the relationship. Identify the existing limitations, your ability to take action, and actively work in favor of upgrading relations.

As long as you and your spouse have a common desire to improve, there is more that can be done. 

For example, Naomi becomes hurt and angry when she feels that her husband does not give her his full attention. She claims that he is never fully present and is constantly troubled by innumerable issues. She doesn't communicate to him what's really bothering her and as a result, ends up feeling beaten down and frustrated. 

What is preventing her from having an open and honest conversation with her husband? The culprit is often the ego.
"Why do I have to tell him that he does not give me enough attention? He needs to figure this out on his own!"

Let me ask you a question, do you think your man is a mind reader? Well, he's not!
In his understanding, he may be giving you more than enough. This is when trouble begins. Lack of communication.

To be Continued ... 

Much love 
Estee 💟

Saturday, December 31, 2016

HAPPY AND BLESSED NEW YEAR


Just before 2016 clears the stage for the blessed New Year, I want to thank you all for making 2016 so meaningful and memorable for me. 

Wishing everyone a year of happiness and health, a year of prosperity and success, a new year of security and relaxation, a year of peace and tranquility.

May we have a year of positive change, a year full of joy and excitement in all that we do.

May we have the sense to focus on what's important to us and let go of what is no longer beneficial, may we have the ability to move forward in life more emboldened and confident.

May we live together in unity, cooperation and mutual respect.

May this year bring upon us the recognition of the value of love, may we have the sense and strength to give it wholeheartedly and unconditionally.

May we be full of excitement in anticipation to experience life from a place of curiosity and wonder. 

May we release bottled up negative feelings and be free to love, because that's what makes us feel whole, happiest, and most content.

May we have the courage to be who we are, may we concentrate in doing good, follow our heart and do what we love.

May we begin each day with smiles and joy.

May we walk together hand in hand in friendship and love. 
I wish a jovial, healthy, successful, abundant, victorious and blessed year ahead. 

Love Blessings 
Estee 

Estee Levinson, Relationship Communication Strategist - Creating harmonious communication, one relationship at a time. esteelevinson.com The Path To Enlightenmen

Sunday, December 4, 2016

Making Your Thoughts Become Reality

Long ago a righteous man, went to his rabbi seeking advice on how to rid himself of the constant bothersome thoughts he'd been having. Unfortunately the rabbi could not help, but suggested he see a different rabbi, who lives in a distant city. As time passed, he couldn't bear his affliction any longer, so the righteous man decided to take his rabbi's advice, in a quest to lessen his burden. After a long cumbersome journey, in freezing temperatures, the man finally arrived at the door step of the rabbi who he believed had the key to his salvation. He could see through the window some folks around a table, enjoying a delicious, hot soup. The righteous man was hungry, shivering and wet to the bone. He knocked at the door, but no one answered. He knocked again - no answer. He knocked several more times, until he finally gave up, curled into a ball and went to sleep at the doorstep. A few minutes passed and suddenly the door opened by an elderly man. The righteous man jumped up and said: why didn't you open the door to your house when I knocked? The frail old man said, this is to show you that when you are the master of your kingdom/home/body/soul, YOU decide who enters your home and who stays out. You came to me because you cannot seem to get rid of your "bothersome thoughts", yes? Yes. The man answered. Well, it's very simple, although I heard you knocking, I still chose not to answer the door. Similarly, you also do not have to allow any thoughts that don't bring you some kind of benefit to enter your mind, fester and cause nothing but havoc. Likewise, we decide who we welcome into our domain: we choose our thoughts. We have the ability, like no other animal on this earth, to imagine the feelings we wish to have, bringing them to life - that's our job as creators. A creator is someone who takes responsibility for his inner world - he is driven by his desire to resolve his internal conflict between good and evil. Much love Estee

Friday, November 4, 2016

"Our Foundation is a Direct Result of the Influence Our Parents Had Over Us as Children.."

As children we learn everything we know from our parents as they are our primary educators.

The trouble is, sometimes what we learn and what later may become entrenched in us, can turn out to be one of our biggest sources of pain.

We learn, adopt and proceed to form various belief systems, thought patterns and behaviors  that our parents exhibited. We learn how to be intimate, how to argue, how to make up, how to love... And the list goes on.

According to social psychology, our personality is shaped and formed by the age of six. What we absorb by then, influences us for the rest of our lives - it literally becomes our model of the world.

In spite of the fact that often times our parents can have a negative influence on our intimate relationships and how we relate to those around us, we have the power to change that paradigm. 

We must have the desire and courage to be introspective. Self discovery and consciousness are the necessary tools for change to occur. 

We must look deeper into our relationship patterns and belief system in order to obtain the quality of life we deserve. 

This will provide the opportunity for personal growth as well as the ability to manage healthy relationships based on respect, trust and self worth. 

Once I realized this, it completely changed my view of parenting and marriage. It opened my eyes to gain a greater understanding about my childhood experiences which enabled me to heal and find peace. This had a profound affect on all of my relationships and how I communicate. 

Can you relate to this in your own life? 

Please share your thoughts so we can have an open discussion. 

Much love 
Estee 💟

Thursday, October 13, 2016

Cutting the Apron Strings

My daughter has grown up and become a woman who wants something very different than what I had planned and dreamed for her to be. 

Most often parenting can be rewarding as well as painful. 

After all, we are never truly happy and at peace, as long as, one of our children is in pain. They are connected to our soul, no matter what. When they are babies, we check to see if they are breathing properly and as they grow, we often remind them to stop and take a breath. It's not by chance that we are chosen to be the parents of our children. Our children are a gift. There's a hidden meaning behind everything, an understanding that leads to enlightenment.

My daughter met a man who she loved very much and they married. Initially, I will admit, I experienced some difficulty. This is not what I had envisioned for her. I had many plans and dreams for her. I wanted her to be everything that I had dreamed for myself:
to successfully finish her degree, to build an admirable career and most importantly, to stand on her own - become independent. "But these are your desires," I reminded myself. And yes, I had many desires for her, but they were not related to how my daughter saw herself.

I learned an important lesson. What's good for me, does not always comply with the wishes of the people around me. It does not really matter if it is my daughter, my husband or one of my friends. I must understand and accept that although in certain situations, it may not be how I would think or act, nevertheless, I must always respect the opinions of others.  Every person has their own vision, individuality and unique way of doing things. Therefore, there is no need to argue or disagree. Everyone has a different perception and perspective on life. How can I be certain that my way is right? How can I be sure that I know or understand better than they do?

So back to my daughter ... the girl-woman and her plans. She never dreamed of a brilliant career. All she ever wanted and dreamed of was to have a family of her own. That was the fireball burning inside her. She wanted to realize herself as a mother. How can I argue with that? She is loving, warm and nurturing; this is what gives her a sense of fulfillment. 

Isn't that what is most important and what we strive for? Isn't that what everyone is chasing, even if they are not aware of it? 

The bottom line is, if we break down the components of life, we are all searching for love, more and more love. Giving and receiving love. 

Love reveals itself in many forms. Love is displayed in the form of warmth, acceptance, appreciation, recognition, advertising, etc ... we all yearn for that feeling, we all live for it. Love is the elixir of life, it is what sends the blood rushing in the veins, it is what gives us the power to deal with various contests in life.

I understood, I finally internalized this simple truth: we are all searching blindly for the same things in the dark, all those things that are right there under our noses and are in fact, the most important: a loving glance, a warm hug saturated with emotion, a statement expressing confidence and support and a sense of acceptance from the environment . What is the common denominator? It is the feeling that we call "love". The recipe to experience all of this is none other than giving. To be engaged in giving. Help, give advice, listen patiently, smile, give a hug ... and it will all comes back to us in the same way. What we give is what we will receive  - it is either a blessing or a curse.

I embraced my daughter warmly, overflowing with love and let free all my desires which in turn vanished. I accepted her and her wishes. I loved her as I never did before. All that's left now is to eagerly wait for the moment when the miracle occurs and I happily see my daughter lovingly embracing her child, just as I used to and still do.

If you can relate to this, please share your experience. 

Much love 
Estee 💟