You do not always have to reach the bottom - your biggest upset.
You can learn through other people's "bottom" - Who is a wise man, one who learns from the experience of others.
It may appear to be selfish, but a caring "selfish"person, truly wants to have it good, however, he worries about others well being as well as his own.
Conversely, one who is only concerned with himself - the egoist - does not understand why he is so unhappy ...
Then, he either stays in his misery or he begins to recognize how the world works and starts operating differently.
A person that instantly arrives at great success, never experiencing grief and pain, when everything is handed on a silver platter, does not own his success.
He did not earn it, therefore, he cannot keep it as his own.
However, when you reach "overnight success" - which is actually hard work of many years - then, you can experience inner fulfillment.
There are no free meals!
A person should focus on his goals. The more his direct purpose is defined, and the more pain and sorrow of others he's been exposed to (what he learned along the way), the greater personal power he gains in order to reach his goal.
The more concern you have for yourself only: "me, myself and what I deserve... " - you are actually digging a hole for yourself - it is not at all clear whether you'll ever climb out, back to safety.
There are many people who fall and never get back up again - they have lost the "coordinates" to their purpose in the fall itself - they are in the dark and they do not even see it ..
For example, a person can go through a terrible trauma, and from that moment on, that is what defines his life - the victim of trauma never left the pit.
He becomes angry and blames the whole world. Outwardly, it seems like he has forgotten, however the pathology paints a different picture.
"I want to take revenge on the whole world because I suffered ...."
"I suffered... therefore, its OK for me to be cruel to the world that has been cruel to me ... I deserve it.. "
"Who has to pay me back for my suffering?"
In the extreme of things - that is how people become killers.
No matter what trauma you've gone through, it still does not give you the "license" to be cruel ..
The greatness of man is measured by his ability to "climb above sorrow", grow from it and become a better person ~